Screw That Love Song

Screw it! I had retyped this line for zillion times and that's it. No more rephrasing.

A close friend told me that I should enjoy what I am experiencing right now, lost and confused. And she promised that I will eventually get through it. The funny thing was, I used to know what I want to do with my life. It all went hay wire after a couple of failed relationships. Amazing what they did to me.

It has been three months since the last relationship and a whole lot of things happened since then. I can only described it "messy". It is so messy and I was vulnerable and lost. I hopped on one thing to another just to make myself feel better. Impulsive decisions were made and regretted. Some were beautifully wrong. Yes, they were beautiful. Of how it turned out eventually.

Attention received and tears dropped. I am hopeful yet fearful. Love life never go easy on me.

I repeat

Two months had gone by.

Reality kicked in yesterday with tremendous pain and fear. The smoke rose and the heart sunk.

A friend once told me about making choices, "There are no right or wrong choices. Only choices. Once made, you live it".

The same shit hole, will you jump into it more than once?

Sometimes choices are made obvious. Most of the times, it does not. It came clear but later, it turned sour.

Happiness is overrated. I repeat.

Be a Pirate in FB

Woot! Found something fun in Facebook setting today. You can change your Language to Pirate!

Here's how. Go to 'Home' and select 'Account Setting' from the drop down menu.

Under 'General', select Language 'English (Pirate)'

Tadah! 'haillin' from Bukit Mertajam. Ho ho ho! Oh wait, that's Santa :D

You can even terbalik your England. Lolz

:D

Above the Cloud

It is strange how life unfolds itself in front of us. Full of surprises, joy and sorrow.

What we used to be and what we were not are no longer a part of the now. I once thought that I will end up being hopeless for the rest of my life. Yes, I really thought so. For the power that I have is so little that it was almost to no existence.

To be where I am today was something out of expectation.

Photo credits: flixya.com

The Overrated Happiness

It didn't appear to me that you will leave me any notes.

I look at the time and that was exactly before I went to pack up. What's left?



Happiness is overrated.

I wish you well

A few days had gone and it actually felt like forever.

Pain.

1. Your scent
2. Your dirty laundry
3. Your nerdiness
4. Your indifference
5. Your habit

Getting used to something and wanting to get rid of that something is not exactly my strength. Not really my weakness too.

I can talk about it. Whoever and whenever without intense emotions. I know it will hit me soon.

I wish you well.

An Accident

Once, I thought it would be the end. Somehow it rises and I see a strand of opportunities.

Change is a luxury for you, I presume. The kind of luxury that you could not afford. Perhaps, it is just too expensive.

The tiny hands of yours speak for you. The words you articulate tell me that you are insecure. As much as I want to help, I could not. Nobody can help you other than yourself. For the greatest enemy lives in you.

I, on the other hand, took the path that I never thought I would. It seemed like an accident. I like what I have and your presence should add colours to mine.

Fear.

Possession.

I wish you well.

Kuching Day 3, 4 and 5

It's almost a week since I come back from Kuching and it felt like it just happened yesterday...

Didn't do much things for the following days except to spend time with each other. That was very important to me at least. We learn more about each other again. In details.

Day 3:

 Kim Kim and her new fake tattoo

 Mich showed us her baby photo :P

This was very the deja vu. I dreamt about this particular scene before...

and we made the drunken bears

I watched my two best friends from behind and I had tears in my eyes. I'm thankful that I had two good friends who never failed to be there for me when I needed them. What else can I ask from them?

Day 4:

It was a day filled with mixed feelings. Knowing that we are going to part soon...

Taken while waiting for food

Naturally, we didn't take many pictures on that day. There was just too much in head.

We did a lot of talking. Especially when it comes to the end of the day. Feeling exhausted, we still carry on with the heart pouring session which we always do.

A change has incurred and confirmation obtained. Brutal honesty. Long awaited one.

Confined.

I lifted my soul.

Day 5:

I think I was dreaming when I book the return flight. I got the timing all wrong. Mich is leaving in the morning and mine in the evening. I had much time to spare but that just added more sorrow to it.

 On the way to airport

 when we all started crying...

 and Kim was being "insensitive", took out the tissue paper much later :D

One of a kind friendship I treasure. You're always in my mind...

Kuching Day 2

It was pretty amazing to know how the three of us managed to keep the friendship going till today. We don't talk everyday though we try to. We don't see each other often for sure and we don't really call each other as well. A year of inactive interaction did not makes thing too awkward for us. We still make fun of each other like we used to. More importantly, we still care and love.

 At Ainun's place for home made Sarawakian laksa!

 I remembered I was sick that day and I looked at the fried rice and sighed. Mich did the face to cheer me up <3 <3

It was great then

So we decided to wake up early to grab the best Sarawakian laksa. Was a little hard to stay awake until we saw this...

The hot chick and her infra red device for sinus. 

So I had my first Sarawakian laksa that morning with some interesting aunt insisting that we take a packet of local snack. We didn't take it though. 

 Sarawakian popiah with super a lot of nuts

 Damn sweet three layer tea

Choon Hui Sarawakian Laksa

There we met Cletus, Mich's friend. With two Kuching lang on board, we went on a mini city tour.

Kim and Clay

We walked to the Hills thinking if we want to go over to Rain Fest. After some thinking, we went back to the city tour instead. 

1st Kucing

and some random shots along the way...

 I have a thing for old buildings

and old bikes

2nd Kucing

Damn! I'm older than this cat :(

The highlight of the trip was when we were taking pictures with the giant white cat. Some dudes on the lorry did the "phee weet" thing while we were posting for the pictures. Mich was very quick to respond to it. She yelled, "Apa sal lu?!" The guys went quiet. I think they were like "Si amoi ni...."

I don't know how far we walked but it was oh-so-tourisy. Pretty like the feeling of that. It gives me time to think. Surprisingly.

We were sweating and the weather was madness. As per suggested by Mr. Lee, we went on walking to the Hokkien park. And we did some crazy things again.

That was fun. I wanna do it again!

Aiks, I forgot to mention that there's some cooling factor in this Hokkien park. The Megatron! I mean Megahorn. Am I right with the name? :S

 megahorn?

 Clay saw someone having this and he wanted one too. Just some milo powder on a pile of sweetened crushed ice

It was about lunch time and we were not exactly hungry. But... we MUST eat. It's a Malaysian thing. You eat as you go.

 belachan mihun

 prawn paste with kangkung and cuttlefish

tomatoe mee

We went back home after that. To bath and rest for the night. 

On the way out, Mich pointed that I got this sun burn on my shoulder.

quite the obvious right. How can I not notice it...

Kim Kim had a crisis with work. I guessed that was pretty much the time when we see friends caring for each other. We followed her to the office. Once she has settled the issue, she gave us this face. Instantly, we know all is well.

We boarded the bus to Rain Fest and the first thing we did was to camwhore.

 Me: Why are you guys making faces?!

Me: I also want

And I dozed off  zZzzzzzZZzzzzz.......................until we were about to reach Damai.

 camwhoring is always the first thing we did. I guess it's understandable. We don't get to do this often

 Some dude practising by the beach

 the winner of talent search. They were awesome!

first tuak!

 nachos!

Mich was really happy with her turtle

 Kim Kim getting inked

 No idea what expression that was..

I have a naked mermaid on my leg!

It was really tiring that day. Zee Avi threw the drum stick at me while I was back facing the stage. That was really unexpected. Oh well...

Second day. Exhausted and contented.